It has been 1277 days since starting this blog. For the slightly number-impaired folk like myself: that is 3 years, 5 months, and 30 days. Now the reason I so randomly bring this up is because someone recently said ‘Wait? You still run that blog? Why?‘.

Fair question to ask because, let’s face it, while I started this to see if maybe I could make a living out of it (well actually, not a living, ‘pocket money’ is a better term) that evidently did NOT pan out.

At all.
As in zero pocket-money.

And I am very much okay with that simply because I know exactly all the reasons WHY it did not pan out. A succesful blog you see actually needs a face, a blogger who puts herself out there. Whether that be in terms of sharing personal style, stories or advice, followers love to see the person behind all that is shown or written. I follow so many bloggers myself (although over the years I have done some pretty drastic culling in that department) and I absolutely love to really get a sense of the blogger, it is in the end what keeps me interested. And therein lies the issue with me: I have not managed to do that on a more professional level.

For one, I absolutely hate having my photo taken. I am sure a psychologist will have a field day with this but it is just what it is. I love wearing great outfits, think I actually look pretty decent in them and I do get complimented on them, but ask me to pose and I freeze up. That and being my own worst critic of course because NO photo is ever good enough, I am and forever will be of the solid conviction I just look horrible in all of them. I did have a go at it once here but after that I simply lost courage.

Now, a very dear friend actually photographed for that shoot (she recently shot the photo at the top by the way, she is also literally the only one I feel comfortable with doing this) and that brings me to another issue: shooting outfits takes time. And lots of it. As I recall we actually spent quite a few hours outside for that blog post.
And we are not talking twenty-or thirty year olds with ample time to do this: we are over forty with families, day jobs and lots of daily life stuff that are far more important than outfit shoots. I dare say, since getting together even for a cup of coffee sometimes just not happens because of, well life, it will be near impossible to do shoots on a regular basis. Leaves of course the option of hiring a professional photographer: the long and the short of that one is obviously ‘not going to happen because my kids need new sneakers/house needs repainting/car insurance has to be paid’.

Another issue is that, while I did write some personal blog posts over the years, I have not done that on a regular enough basis. I often get told I should write more, that sharing personal stuff suits me and to be honest, I do like that buzz I get from putting something personal out there (actually feeling that buzz right now!). But I am just not always in the mood for that. And forcing myself on a weekly basis well…meh.
I am also THE worst with deadlines, it does not matter if the deadline is from an outside source or imposed by myself, if a deadline is in sight I somehow revolt against it and I end up feeling miserable right up till the end. That said: my best work nearly always happens 2 hours before any deadline so maybe I should be setting them after all when it comes to personal blogposts…what do you lot think?

And here is something that is well and truly a turn off in the field of blogging as a profession (and if this bit sounds moany, that is exactly my intention): collaborations. Or as I call it: companies trying to persuade a very much unknown blogger to do work for free. Yes, it is much written about in blogger circles and it seems to be pretty standard practice and even the acceptable thing to do when you really want to make something of your blog and even when you already ARE an established blogger. But guess what: not me. I have gotten so many emails from companies, big or small, presenting themselves as oh so interested in my blog and proceeding to ask for a collaboration. And at the start I honestly replied to all of them asking what they had in mind. Well it all boiled down to ‘you write a blog post or post an Instagram photo and that will get you exposure..isn’t that cool?’.
No it is not cool, really not acceptable and I refuse. The worst one? A VERY large realtor in the United States asking me to make a moodboard with the Pantone colour of that year and post about it on my blog. With plenty of links to their company, obviously. Keep in mind: I am in the Netherlands and NOT a specialist interior blogger. On a whim I decided to let them know my going rates, just to see what their reaction would be. Hold on to your hats (and again: we are talking about a LARGE realtor in several states):

‘We do not unfortunately have a budget to pay bloggers and such.’

Yeah.

Let’s get back to the question I started with: why do I still blog if there is clearly no pocket money aspect to it? Let me start by saying I have found another career to pursue (and very happy with it I may add), that of community administrator for KetoDiet App and as keto coach in my own practice Sevi Rutgrink – Keto Coaching. So the ‘pocket money’ issues are resolved.

But I still absolutely love fashion/art/music/interior design/travel, you name it. And it really does give me pleasure to put my finds on the blog, like a little lifestyle and fashion journal all for myself. But that last statement is very unfair to my followers: because despite the fact I did not ‘make it’ as a professional blogger, I did somehow manage to collect 2451 followers. Yes, that is all of you. And I find that so amazing and wonderful, I can not begin to tell you all how much I appreciate the fact you actually like what I have to share.

So I keep doing it, blogging as an expression of myself and hopefully entertaining you all. And I want to leave you with this: let me know if there are subjects you would like to hear more on from me, whether that be personal opinions, fashion topics, travel tips, you name it. I would love more interaction, hopefully you do too!

Photo by Elles Willems